Wednesday, December 20, 2006

New Year celebration

One thing which everyone is asking everyone else now a days is what are your plans for new year. Never knew it is such a big deal. Till 2 year back, I use to spend my New Year in train from Delhi to KGP wishing handful of friends and loads of strangers in the process. and that was the case with every one else too. After that it became a usual daaru with friends in campus thing.

But now everything is different. If you have not made New year plans, junta will look at you like you are an alien. Dont know what the fuss is all about. Why cant i just be with friends, drink with some loud hard rock music as background. But nahhhhhhh, in Mumbai, that makes you an looser. Unless you have spent thousands of bucks on your new year celebrations, no one considers that you also celebrated new year.

So someone please suggest some good beach to go to near by.

~missthosegoodcheapoldwayofcelebratingnewyear

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

I am back

Post IIMC i thought of refraining myself from writting anymore. I know it was a great loss for humanity, but what the heck!!
But I am back now. Now now do not start thinking that I am doing this for the greater good of humanity. I am doing this as I have no other option left.
Earlier i started my blog, when I was bored to death and had absolutely nothing to do in life. Now I am working and still do not have much to do so here I am.
~Getreadyformoretorture

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Its over

this is the end of one chapter ( n what a chapten this has been) in my life and the beginning of a new chapter ... MBA is over, got placed ... now what?? well i don't know ... have nothing to look forward to in the next 3 montha except my trip to Bhutan .... starting 2moro

after that back to square ... nothing to do ... leaving each day as it comes n no idea of what i will do whole day .... after being used to the hectic (:P) life in IIMC, this will be a major change in my lifestyle .. but well, life is full of changes n one adjusts accordingly ....

for the time being just enjoying my last few days at IIMC, last few best dayzzz of my life ....

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Day of ManGames


Finally, the second most awaited day by any IIMCian is here. It’s the day of end-term of ManGames. Different people wait for ManGames for different reasons. DM junta waits for it, as they will not have to hear taunts on ManGames from DCM junta and DCM junta waits as we got to do puja for our poor DM friends. You can divide the whole day in three parts, first is before ManGames exam, and secondly during ManGames exam and last but not the least is post ManGames exam.

Different kind of activities happens in all three parts. Pre exam time is very busy for every1, DM junta will be busy mugging ManGames and we DCM junta will be very busy













making fun of them and doing puja of two GODs of ManGames, GOD MN Pal and Assistant GOD Aviator.














During ManGames exam, things changes, mood changes. Focus of DCM junta shifts from making fun of DM to how to survive once they are back. As trust me, when 200 people give bumps to 50 people, experience can be really painful.

But we decided on a new strategy, strategy of attack. We decided that before DM dunk and bumps us, we will dunk them. Attack is the best defense. But once we dunked them, what happened to us should be written as worst kind of torture any human has faced in our generation. Kicks, chappal, shoes everything was used that can be used to bump us and we have to tolerate all. But once this is done, than we are friends again and move on to dunking any dry person we can find in campus. Sort of what happens on Holi you can say.














Lots of pain is involved in this for both DM (tolerating guys like me can be real torture) and for DCM (ask our rear and they will tell you the pain they are in rite now). But that pain is worth it for the fun we have later on, as you can see in pic

~ManGames roxxxxxxxx
~~KheloDMKhelo

Great answers to some stupid form questions

While applying for a job in any company, in all probability you will get some really stupid questions, but don't worry here you will get some really great answers to all those stupid questions
Q) What do you consider as your single most important achievement and why?
A) My single most achievement in life is that i completed this form. I considers this as my single most important acheivement as filling this form tested my patience (how else could you fill a 10 page form with hundred of questions who, on a scale of 1 to 10 of stupidity, ranks 20) and made me tolerable to assholes like the one who prepared this form
Q) What motivates you to seek a career in consulting?
A) The fact that the kind of profile i have is a perfect match for the one required in consulting helped me made this choice. I love giving GLOBE, i not only preach it, but also practice at any point of time in my life. So, it makes me perfect for a conuslting job where only thing you need to do is give GLOBE
Q) Outline briefly your reasons for applying to XYZ
A) The reason i have applied to yuor company is that i need a job, and from previous experience of seniors, no other company is ready to take me, but you have the track record of taking good for nothing guys like me
Q) Describe a instance when you set a challenging goal for yourself.
A) When i saw this form, it irritated me to the extent that i wanted to burn the company down and kill the HR person who made this form. But as i am desperate for a job, so decided to take it up as a challenge. It was challenging cze of reasons i explained earlier. I used google with the string "answers to most stupid questions" and got all the questions in your form at the top of list.
Q) Describe a situation where your role as a leader helped a group achieve an important result
A) Some days back, we were running out of joint and every one was tired to go out and get some. So, i took the role of a leader in the group and motivated people to go out. Finally two idiots (what else will you call a guy who agrees to good for nothing guy like me) and we all were able to enjoy yet another joint filled hour
Q) Describe a time when you used your initiative to simplify or improve/change a process
A) normally junta prepares seperate answers for various form questions and than copy paste them in the form. To avoid work, i prepared a Max Globe answer which fits into various catagories of questions as a result reducing my work
Q) Describe a time when you felt pressure to compromise on your value in a work situation?
A) I have inherited the value of returning wallet after stealing all the stuff from inside and i never compromise on it. But once i really liked the wallet, so i was in dilemna of whether to keep it or stand up to my values and return the empty wallet to the owner. Even though i really liked the purse n bought it later by paying for it (paid for soemthing for the first time in my life), i didn't compromised on my values
Q) What is your Statement of Purpose?
A) I belong to an entrepreneur family (all runs an organized mafia units) and learned the values of hard work, honesty (don't be surprised, even mafias have honesty, rather they are much more honest than any other people as here word once given is kept at all cost or you die) from my parents. So, i would like to work in an organization which provides me opportunities to go on international projects (wanna make my family business global, after all this is the time of globalizationa, why should mafia be left behind), enough opportunity to launder black money and where i don't have to work for more than 10-15 mins a day so that i can put effort to expand my family business. In return company will get protection from all kind of mafia in India, none of their employees will be kidnapped ever, no one will be murdered. This seems like a pretty good deal for you as you are getting so many benefits in return of just a few small favors.
~I have made you an offer, you can't refuse
So, what are you thinking, just copy paste these answers from here on your forms, and your job in any kinda company you are dreaming of is assured

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Job openings at Max Globe Inc

***********Job Openings*************
At Max Globe Inc, we are hiring for various positions. We are in the business of providing careers. We working in the highly niche segment of providing world class, highly sophisticated, higher end GLOBE for all the company forms vella HR people prepared as a recruitment criteria for their companies.
We promise to provide you and fun and globe filled environment. We cherish continuous innovation, creativity and out-of-the-box thinking in our company.
If you think, only thing you are good in at is giving GLOBE to others, than this is the right place for you to work.
We need people who can GLOBE creatively on any question and can give different kind of GLOBE for the same question
Currently our team includes
Vikas freerider Tayal, CEO Max Globe Inc
N placerep Raju, Chairman Max Globe Inc
Nihar magadhnaresh Ranjan: Relationship (he prefers fair sex) manager
All has establisehd themselves in the field of world class Globe over the time.
Some FADs (Frequently asked dumb questions)
1) Whats in it for me?
Being a small company, you will be given responsibility at very early point in your career which will help you learn fast and develop various skills. We consider our people as our most valuable asset, so we have a very focus on people management within the organization. We practice highly innovative, world class HR practices
2) What are my exit options?
In case you decide to leave our company (which is hard to believe, but what can i say, some idiots are always there), we provide you excellend exit options. Working with us will make you an expert in different company forms which would help you in filling a excellent form for yourself. We will also provide you consulting to fill up your form, totally free of charge (we are more eager to kick out idiots like you than you are to leave this organization)
3) What is the compensation package?
We provide a competetive compensation package.
4) What is the recruitment process?
In the first round, all the interested candidates will have to send a 10 page globe on anything. In second round, candidates will be required to give different GLOBE on the same topic and this process will be repeated 5 times. We have choosen this stringent selection to select only the best GLOBERs. For those who survive this selection procedure, offers will be made on the spot.
So, what are you waiting for?? start globing
Looking forward to creative fart from you
~Vikas Tayal
CEO, Max Globe Inc

My last class at IIMC :(

Yesterday i attended the last class of IIMC and most probably last of my academic career as my parents has warned me that they wont pay for my studies any more n i have other important things to do, like party etc, with my money. So, in short can say that i won't be studying any more and i have attended the last class of my life.
It was a very emotional moment for me, making me overwhelmed. So, you might be interested in knowing what we did in our last class, and if you are interested, than i just don't care and would write it here anyway.
This is my last class. It was a quiz or should i say a series of quizzes of another shitty course of MIS, BusinessIntellegience, here. Starting with essay on "Applications of BI in Pharma", in which i wrote whatever crap came to my mind and such a brilliant crap it was that if pharma companies read that, they might scrap all their IT systems and start using what i suggested and if they do that, that would be the end of pharma companies as we know them now, or rather in anyway you might know of them.
And then came the second quiz in which as you can see in pic below, was trying to think but in vain. After all sochne ke liye dimaag main kuch hona to maangta hai na. But i still tried and tried but all in vain. afterall mere jaise logo ka kuch nahi ho sakta, yeh to sab jaante hai. Overall we enjoyed a lot in our last quiz, it was full of sentimental moments like submitting a blank answer script (just kidding, i wrote my name on it), waving for pics in between the quiz and posing for videos while quiz is going on.
I can just say that it was the end of an era, the era of freeriding, era of masti, era of loosing your brain over some stupid academic things. Now we all will enter the industry with what i don't know and what will we do even that i don't know.
Just know one thing, though our life in IIMC is coming to an end, but IIMC will always be a part of us. As i say: "You can take a IIMCian out of a IIMC but you can't take out IIMC out of an IIMCian" (i know its a copy, and don't tell me that you expect something original from me)
Will miss you IIMC :((
~IIMC roxxxxxxxxx

Saturday, February 25, 2006

All set for final placements

hurrayyyyyyyyyyy!!!! i started my final placements preps 2day .... went to SHoppers Stop, bought a formal shirt, borrowed a suit from one of my junior AshKD and gave it for dry cleaning, had a hair cut .... so i think i am all set for finals now ... only thing left is studies, but they are not that important, are they???

Friday, February 24, 2006

A idiot guide to choosing a career

Every one faces this question, at point or another in his life. Which career to choose from all the options? Should i go in I Banking, be a consult, join a bank or become a marketer??

My take on this issue is that look at following parameters and make your final decision

1) What Interests u?
Question yurself whether you are happy working on financial models, whether wearing a suit all the time thrills you or whether you are one of those who are happy being in the field?? think what excites you and find out the list of companies offering jobs in that area

2) Future of company?
Now look at the future of those companies, whether their sector is growing or not? Even if company is not growing by sector is growing, i would say joining that company might be a good option.

3) Career path in the company?
Now look at the career path in the company. In my opinion, if a company is offering early responsibility than joining that company makes more sense than one who has a big brand name, but it takes u years to get any real responsibility.

4) culture in the company?
If you have the personality of one who is restless all the time and want to do something new always, than working in a company where only thing you will do is to follow order will never make you happy and sooner or later you will leave that company, no matter what they are paying you.

5) Pay package?
Pay package is a important parameter but in my opinion, not the most important parameter. Package offered should be good enough for you so that you don't feel ashamed in telling you friends, parents about it. After a certain limit, relevance of package is no longer their. Limit will vary from one person to another.

6) Your goals?
where does a company fits in your future goals. If it fits, go for it, otherwise no point wasting time in that company. If have never thought of your goals, don't worry, thr r many like u. Rather thr r many, who can't even answer the first question properly.

List of parameters is not exhaustive and contains only those parameters i have used to choose my list of companies.

After looking at these parameters, you will have a short list of companies you would like to join. Voila u have your list, apply in them and prepare as well as u can.

OK enough of bullshitting, on a serious note just look at the location, number of gals in the company & pay package and you have your list of companies.

BOL to all